The Power of Caring

Growing up, I considered myself to be a caring person. I was always the one listening to my friends' problems and taking on their burdens. But over the years, as those who I cared about betrayed me or took me for granted, I began to become more cynical. I began to believe the lie that in this world no one actually cares about others. Everyone only cares about themselves and they only pretend to care about another person when they can get something out of that person.

Sometimes we pray things like "help me to love" to God without understanding how He will teach us these things. Sometimes we don't expect Him to teach us something through our pain and tears.

Lately, God has been teaching me about the power of caring. But it definitely hasn't been easy.
I have been confronted with how little I care about others because of my selfishness, laziness, and fear. I honestly don't care about that person's issues, I don't care enough to do something about it, and I'm afraid that if I do care, that person will just end up not appreciating me anyways.

I broke down crying in bible study today. how embarrassing. because I realized the heart of the problem was that I forgot just how much God cares about me. Everything that I do must overflow from what I receive from God. and I haven't been able to care for others because I'm so focused on taking care of myself without being able to see how much God cares for me and how He's placed people in my life who genuinely care for me.

I remember one time it was pouring outside and I didn't have an umbrella. While a friend and I were waiting in the Chick-fil-A line I told him that by the time I get my food and walk out, the rain is going to stop. He asked me how I knew this, and I told him it was because I prayed to God that the rain would stop by the time I get my food.  He gave me a weird look and said "I think God has bigger things to worry about"

but back then I had that kind of faith that God loved me and cared for me. there are alot of things that I'm sure are more "important" but still God's love for me is that great. He sees me even though I'm so small because I am valuable to Him. and sure enough right when I walked out, the rain had completely stopped.

I had forgotten just how much God cares for me. yes He cares for those around me. those who I will be serving in ministry and caring for. but I will only end up frustrated with myself and them if I don't have my foundation in God. before I learn how to care for others, I must first realize how much He cares for me.

it took me many mistakes to realize that I am not going to get that care from guys that will come and go.

it took me awhile to understand that my dad cares for me by feeding me and my mom cares for me by buying me clothes and nagging me.

and it took me to the point of brokenness to see how much God cares for me. that though He is the God of the universe He is mindful of me. He looks after me and is concerned about me. deep down I think it's everything that we ever wanted and needed. to matter to someone.

I must remember this. no matter what I'll go through. I know that everything is going to be okay.
because I have an Almighty God who cares for me.

Oh how He loves us so.