Kansas
I had set my alarm for my normal time to wake up on Fridays, but woke up naturally at 5am anyways to check the match results.
---
Congratulations! You have been matched to:
Training Site: University of Kansas
Program: Psychology Internship
---
when I saw the email, I felt a peace. the funny thing is as I was spending time in God's presence, thinking about where I will match. the words "Kansas City" was so clear in my mind. I tried to brush it away, but throughout the week I would think about Kansas. And I remember one moment actually thinking the sentence "You're going to Kansas."
It's even funnier cause Kansas was not even in my top rankings. it was number 5. and also that site was the first interview that I had, which I thought did not go well because one I was jet lagged from traveling to Maryland. Didn't even have time to prepare for the interview because it was the day after my crazy semester ended. Didn't even know the name of the site that was calling for the phone interview, which is why I kept referring to them as "your site" like "oh yes, I'm interested in ....(uhhh, crap what was the name of this place?) um...your site because...."
THE WILL OF GOD IS STRONG. lol I trust this is the place I'm meant to be...
Last night as I was wrestling with God about internship. the song "all is for your glory" came to mind and I started singing the song. the whole day I had been feeling so numb to internship thoughts. my mind and body literally went into such a strong, protective denial that I almost fell asleep a couple times throughout the day and had no thoughts about internship whatsoever.
But as I was talking about with a friend, afterwards I sat in my car and sang that song. and for the first time that day, I felt. tears came to my eyes as I sang it and I felt the presence of God.
I remember the first time I heard that song in the prayer room of IHOP-Kansas city. Laura Hackett was singing that song angelically over us. The presence of God- thick. Causing me to weep.
All is for Your glory, all is for Your name, all is for Your glory
That in all things You may have first place
That in all things You may have preeminence
So put me anywhere, just put Your glory in me
Ill serve anywhere, just let me see Your beauty
And as I sang this song. I repented because honestly God's glory is not my priority. I don't want him to put me anywhere. I want to stay here. I want to be comfortable. My love for God is lukewarm.
So I prayed that God would give the grace to endure whatever it takes to know him. I didn't pray to love him. but to know him. because I am confident that if I know him. if he really as is great as he seems to be. I can't help but love him. I will enjoy giving my all to him, if I truly love him. I would be willing to do anything for those I love.
And the next lyrics go
My God, My joy, My delight
I want to learn and experience what it means to delight in the LORD, to find joy in bringing him glory, to seeing his beauty, to serve him, to be with him. that in the process of uprooting my life and "putting me anywhere." moving to Kansas, there will be joy.
Kansas here I come!
---
Congratulations! You have been matched to:
Training Site: University of Kansas
Program: Psychology Internship
---
when I saw the email, I felt a peace. the funny thing is as I was spending time in God's presence, thinking about where I will match. the words "Kansas City" was so clear in my mind. I tried to brush it away, but throughout the week I would think about Kansas. And I remember one moment actually thinking the sentence "You're going to Kansas."
It's even funnier cause Kansas was not even in my top rankings. it was number 5. and also that site was the first interview that I had, which I thought did not go well because one I was jet lagged from traveling to Maryland. Didn't even have time to prepare for the interview because it was the day after my crazy semester ended. Didn't even know the name of the site that was calling for the phone interview, which is why I kept referring to them as "your site" like "oh yes, I'm interested in ....(uhhh, crap what was the name of this place?) um...your site because...."
THE WILL OF GOD IS STRONG. lol I trust this is the place I'm meant to be...
Last night as I was wrestling with God about internship. the song "all is for your glory" came to mind and I started singing the song. the whole day I had been feeling so numb to internship thoughts. my mind and body literally went into such a strong, protective denial that I almost fell asleep a couple times throughout the day and had no thoughts about internship whatsoever.
But as I was talking about with a friend, afterwards I sat in my car and sang that song. and for the first time that day, I felt. tears came to my eyes as I sang it and I felt the presence of God.
I remember the first time I heard that song in the prayer room of IHOP-Kansas city. Laura Hackett was singing that song angelically over us. The presence of God- thick. Causing me to weep.
All is for Your glory, all is for Your name, all is for Your glory
That in all things You may have first place
That in all things You may have preeminence
So put me anywhere, just put Your glory in me
Ill serve anywhere, just let me see Your beauty
And as I sang this song. I repented because honestly God's glory is not my priority. I don't want him to put me anywhere. I want to stay here. I want to be comfortable. My love for God is lukewarm.
So I prayed that God would give the grace to endure whatever it takes to know him. I didn't pray to love him. but to know him. because I am confident that if I know him. if he really as is great as he seems to be. I can't help but love him. I will enjoy giving my all to him, if I truly love him. I would be willing to do anything for those I love.
And the next lyrics go
My God, My joy, My delight
I want to learn and experience what it means to delight in the LORD, to find joy in bringing him glory, to seeing his beauty, to serve him, to be with him. that in the process of uprooting my life and "putting me anywhere." moving to Kansas, there will be joy.
Kansas here I come!